Drama. The certainty of it will surely bring viewers to the Oscar telecast tonight. But how many? The awards show has been bleeding viewers in one steady decline to match that of the overall box office: we’re just not going to the movies as often. Streaming devices have proved so disruptive that movie fans like me should be alarmed. Our beloved and immersive art form is in threat. Yes, wondrous things are happening on small screens, yet streaming changes how we interact with art. If you can pause the film, get up and let your dog out, you are not immersed; this changes how these stories will be told in the future. Already, wizards are at work interpreting data of this very nature.
Now, there are things to be killed off immediately. Let’s start with the casting couch. Set all of them on fire. I’ll dance around that blaze.
Other things I’d like to see gone forever? Read on:
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The red carpet. Who cares? I’m entirely sick of it all or, at the very least, the inane small talk surrounding the shallows. Every time someone is asked what they are wearing, we sink deeper into the mud. Fashion is for the streets and the runway, and I love that all. Gowns on the red carpet are so enough already. Diane Keaton knew this a couple of decades ago. Wear whatever you want and celebrate yourself, and be done with it. Poof, let it be done. Will you really miss it?
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Late-night talk boys as hosts? Yawn. Give me my girls Melissa McCarthy or Tiffany Haddish, or Mindy Kaling. If ever there was a time to let women run the show, it was this year. What the hell were they thinking this year of all years?
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A bloated and boring format. I love movies because of how they make me feel; the trips I take there in the dark, without ever leaving my seat; the puzzles my mind sorts through, and the great thread of humanity coursing through telling me I’m not alone. The Oscar telecast rarely reflects any of this. It’s just one speech after another, most bereft of wit. Why don’t we see more about the craft of these films? Give us more glimpses into the various pegs of the tent: tell us about creating the costumes, makeup, editing, a breakdown of auditions, or bloopers even from the dailies…Give us peeks behind the curtains (and not the kind that results in predatory creeps exposing themselves, either). Far too infrequent in past ceremonies have been fantastic segments of actors sharing what or who inspired their own work. Old clips of films may be troublesome now as the woke culture reexamines history, but seeing our own evolution on screen is an opportunity and one to celebrate.
There is just way too much noise around all of the craft.
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